Aardvarks?
by MzViolet
Summary: From aardvarks to plungers, ther'e always something stupid to behold. Complete.
1. The Aardvarks!

Chocolate Pudding-Chan: Well hi there everyone! This is my fist Fanfic, and it's just pretty much some dumb random thing that I made up on the spot. It's mostly dialog, so you'll be able to tell when the Action is.

Well you all saw it coming, so here it is:

Disclaimer: Chocolate-Pudding-chan does not own Tokyo Mew Mew.

* * *

After a long afternoon of defeat-in-battle, Kisshu, Pai, and Taruto walked sadly into their kitchen to complain about the misfortunes of the day.

"I can't believe everyone saw my tushy!" cried Tart

"Oh, and whose fault was that?! I'm not the one who got high on tuna and 'accidentally' got my pants ripped off!" exclaimed Kisshu in exasperation.

Now it was Pai's turn to contribute: "Both of you, please! I know things didn't go to well but we should keep our chins up, right?"

"Now everyone knows how fat I am!" It was at this moment that Tart burst into tears.

"Oh, come on Taruto – "

"THEY ALL KNOW NOW!!!!!!!"

"Good grief….."

"Geez kish!" Tart had seemingly forgotten about the incident that has come upon a few moment's before. "You don't have to go all Charlie Brown on us!"

It was then that the dark alien leader appeared.

Deep Blue, only then just an aqua-colored orb of light cut in by clearing is throat. (A.N. Can orbs of light _have _throats?)

"Guys, shut up! Our leader is talking!"

"Sorry." The two younger aliens staed at the same time.

Than Deep Blue began;

"I can see that things did not go so well today."

"My Tush—"

"We can explain!"

"It was Taruto's fault."

"_Anyway_, things could have certainly gone bett—WHAT THE HECK IS HE DOING?!"

Deep Blue was talking about Tart, who was than, instead of assuming the "Bowing" pose that was usually taken, was curled up in a ball and mumbling something to himself.

Deep Blue cut in "Uh, excuse me…"

"SHH! I'M HIDING FROM THE AARDVARKS!"

"What?!"

"Oh God…."

All Pai could do was groan and bang his head against the wall.

"Yeah…:"Deep Blue finished. "I'll just be going. Carry on with your…um…business."

The blue glow disappeared, and Kish and Pai just stared at their younger comrade.

"Well." Pai began. "Just what do you have to say for yourself, embarrassing us in front of Deep Blue-sama?!"

"SHUT UP, _PAI_! THE AARDARKS ARE GONNA HEAR YOU!"

* * *

Chocolate Pudding-chan: Well, there you go. I have no idea where I got that idea from. This is my first time writing, so please don't flame me if you hate it. I'll put up more chapter's if you want me to! TTFN! 


	2. An Attempt at Babysitting

Chocolate Pudding-chan: Hello, everyone! I decided (Upon Request) that I would add a new chapter to the story. It's not really a chapter, more like a new entry in a series of small oneshots. Well, here you go! Oh and A special little disclaimer, I do not own any items from the real world mentioned here.

* * *

Kisshu's Babysitting Gig

"Please please please please PLEASE!!!!!!" whined the youngest of the aliens, dragging himself behind Kisshu. "No!" came the older aliens sharp reply. "Come OOOONNNN Kisshu! I'm SSSOOO hungry!" "No! I am _not_ spending any more of my hard-earned baby-sitting money buying _you_ MORE TUNA!" This made Tart chuckle. "Baby-sitting's girly!" "Well I'd rather be girly than broke!" he shouted.

"Who have you been baby-sitting anyway?"

"You."

"Me?! Uh—buh—I don't need a babysitter! I don't even remember you sitting for me!"

"Remember all the times I came over to your house and your mom left us alone and the when she came back she gave me money?"

"Yeah…."

"Well. That was it"

"Why didn't anyone tell me?!"

"Because when we _did_, you kept whining; 'I don't need a baby-sitter! I can take care of myself!' That's why."

"I don't need a baby-sitter! I can take care of myself!"

"See."

"Kisshu, I'm huuuunnnggrryyyyyy!"

"I knooooooowwww that! But like I said, NO MORE TUNA!"

"What should I eat then, Mr. Smarty Pants?!"

"If you're so hungry, eat something else!"

"But Kish…"

"WHAT!"

"We're out of tuna!"

An audible groan from Kisshu.

Kish proceeded to drag Tart o the kitchen. There, he sat him in a chair in front of the table, and on the table, he plopped a bowl, spoon, a carton of milk, and a box of Rice Krispies cereal. "What am I supposed to do now?" asked Tart. "Eat it." Kish replied.

"But this isn't tuna!" "Of course it's not! Wait, aren't you allergic to tuna anyway?!"

"Maybe….."

"JUST EAT THE STINKIN' KRISPIES!"

"Alright, alright, Pushy- face."

Tart then began the process of digging the spoon into the box and attempting to eat the dry cereal. "You forgot the milk." remarked Kish. "Okay!" So, with that, Tart dumped the milk over his head and stuck the spoon in his mouth.

"Apt flubhjed!"

Translation from Spoon-in-mouth-talk: "All finished!"

"Great! Now what am I supposed to do! You didn't even eat the cereal part!"

Tart removes the spoon from his mouth and replies: "Oh! My oopsy!" While pouring the rest of the cereal over his head.

"Ugh! That's gross!"

"The spoon tasted pretty good….."

"Oh, boy….."

"I'm still a teensy-tiny bit hung- "

"I know! So now _you're_ coming to the store with me to buy more food!"

After a long walk to the grocery store, Kish, dragging the whining Tart behind him, proceeded to the bakery isle.

"Here you can eat bread, can't you? Everyone likes bread!"

"I don't like bread unless I have two pieces and there's tuna in between them."

"You're impossible!"

"PICKLES!"

"Yeah."

I was at this moment in time that Taruto spotted a cupcake sitting on one of the bakery racks.

"Ooh! Cupcake! Kish can I have a cupcake? Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, Pleasey-weesey-weese?"

"What ever you just said, fine, if you'll eat it, and it's not anything to do with tuna, fine."

Kisshu hands Tart the cupcake. "YAY!" Tart replies, eagerly chomping into the cheap imitation of a muffin with frosting. After one bite, he promptly spit it out, threw the cupcake of the ground, stepped on it, and pouted.

"What was that for?! I thought you wanted a cupcake!"

"I wanted vanilla!"

"That _was _vanilla, you idiot! I just wasted 6 bucks on that thing!

"It was? Oh. My bad."

Kisshu and Tart led the store and headed back toward home. On the way there, they happened to pass, none other than, the ice-cream shop. Tart, seeing the sugar-filled store, immediately pressed his nose up to the window. "Ice-cream…." He chanted

"Oh, Tart, no. Not again."

"Kisshu, if I don't eat something, I'm gonna die and if you let me die, I'll…I'll… I'll tell Pai on you!"

"Oh, really. Fine. I will buy you ONE ice cream cone. ONE. And if you refuse to eat that, I'll stuff it down your puny little throat!"

" Sniffle You're mean!"

"I know."

Upon entering the establishment, the two were greeted by and overly-cheerful woman standing behind the counter.

"Welcome to Sparky's! May I take your money--- Order! May I take your order?

"_He_ wants and ice-cream cone." Kish stated, obviously out of patience.

"And what flavor would you like?" replied the lady.

"Umm……well…….."

Thus came a two-hour period of standing, waiting for Tart to somehow make up his mind.

"HAVEN'T YOU FINISHED _YET_?!" Kish was about to explode.

"Hold on! I can't choose between chocolate and peach!"

"I thought you didn't like chocolate!"

"I just don't like chocolate _cupcakes_! Double Duh!"

"Just give him the peach!" Kish groaned.

The lady handed Tart the cone with the cream in it, and the two walked out of the shop.

"Happy now, Tart?"

Plop

"Oopsy….."

* * *

Chapter done! 


	3. Author's note!

A little note: I'm so sorry I haven't updated in awhile, I've been at theatre camp all week (I'm just home for today, and I'm uber-busy!) and will be there for the next week. I don't have access to a computer where I am, so you'll have to wait for more! Bye for now!


	4. TV's and Plungers

Chocolate Pudding-chan: Hi! I'm back from the theatre, so it's time for a new chapter! Enjoy!

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T.V Trouble

Kisshu and Pai sat in the kitchen. Pai was flipping through a book, and Kisshu was staring at the ceiling.

"It's quiet….." he murmured.

"Yup."

Then there was an enormous crash, followed by an explosion, and the blaring of the smoke alarm. Kisshu and Pai burst into the living room where Tart _had _previously been watching T.V.

"WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED?!" Pai screamed at Tart, who was now standing in front of a smoking mass that appeared to had been a television.

"Weeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllllllllllllll……………" Tart dragged out the word.

"'Well' what?"

I-was-watching-T.V.-and-I-put-the-toilet-plunger-on-the-T.V-to-see-if-it-would-stick-and-it-did-so-I-tried-to-pull-it-off-but-it-wouldn't-come-off-so-I-tried-yanking-it-off-and- I-think-I-pulled-too-hard-and-I-yanked-the-T.V.-over-and-it-exploded, like this, BOOOOOOOOM! That's what happened.

Tart put on the cutest, most innocent face he could and looked up at Kish and Pai.

"You stuck the _toilet plunger _to the T.V.?" Pai looked like he was about to explode himself.

"Man!" Kisshu said. "I really liked that toilet plunger!"

"Who _cares?_! Do you know how much it's gonna cost to replace the T.V.?!"

"I have a nickel I found stuck to some gum on the sidewalk. You can have it if you want."

"I know you want to help, Tart, but a nickel isn't exactly gonna cover it."

"No really! Keep it! I just picked it up for the gum."

"The _gum_?!"

"It was grape-flavored!"

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Strange...


	5. More Plungers!

Chocolate Pudding-chan: Yeah! Another fic about plungers. This one might be a little stranger than the others. But I'm just warning you.

* * *

Kisshu sat in his room, flipping through an earthly teen magazine. _"This is stupid!" _he thought._ "Why does everyone care about this 'Paris Hilton' person?"_ Suddenly his cell phone rang.

The conversation as followed:

"Hello?"

"Hi Kisshu!"

"Tart, why are you calling me when we're in the same house?"

"I, um, I have a problem."

"We all know that."

"No, I, um, it's sort about the plunger---"

"Oh, God, not this again…."

"NO! I sorta, well, I stuck it to my….butt."

"You WHAT?!"

"I needed to make sure it stuck!"

"Well that's fabulous; I'm hanging up now—"

"No wait! I….well…..I CAN'T GET IT OFF!"

"Oh, no. Oh, no, no, nooooooo………."

"Help me!"

"No! That's gross!"

"But Kisshu! I can't live like this! What if I DIE?! What if when I die they half to decapitate my butt because it won't fit into the coffin? How will I go to the bathroom? How will I fit in my pants? How will I have children! YOU CAN'T MAKE LOVE WITH A PLUNGER IN YOUR BUTT, KISSHU!"

"Okay, you're ten; you shouldn't be worrying about having kids just yet."

All Tart does then is cry.

"Listen, couldn't you ask Pai?"

"He said you were better at this sort of thing"

"This sort of thing, what the— Never mind! Haven't you tried pulling as hard as you can?"

"YES! Kisshu, could you hold me? I think I'm gonna be sick……"

Kish was out of ideas. There he was, with a sobbing kid probably about two rooms away from him with a plunger in his rear end.

"Alright, alright, I'll help you pull it off."

A "Pop" is heard.

"Oh! Never mind! I got it! Wait…… What's that?! HOLY CRAP THER'S A RING ON MY BUTT WHERE THE PLUNGER WAS! WHAT AM I GONNA DO?!"

Tart bursts into Kish's room.

"It's there, SEE?!

"Oh, ew."

* * *

Haha. It's sick. I know. 


	6. Pet problems

Chocolate Pudding-chan: You ask for new chapter, and here she is. Or here he is. Or it. Whatever.

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Taruto burst into the kitchen with a HUGE grin on his face.

"Hey Guys! Hey Guys! HEY GUYS HEY GUYS HEY GUYS HEY GUYS HEEEEEEEYYYYYYY!!!!

"We hear you."

"Lookie what I found!"

Tart then held up a rancid, rabid-infested mange-covered clump of fur. In addition, it had large pointy teeth and a strange, rat-looking tail.

"Gah!" Kisshu screamed in disgust.

"Oh, God, what _is_ that thing?!"

"It's a….a….. Lepedipidis! I named her Popsicle!"

"Huh?"

"Isn't she ADORABLE?! I found her on the side of the road."

"How can you tell it's a she?"

"Well, Mr. Science, if you're so unsure, you can check yourself!"

"I think I'll pass….."Pai winced.

"Tart…" Kish began "You gotta get rid of that…….that thing!"

"I _told _you! It's a Lepedipidis!"

"Yeah. It goes. NOW!"

"But WHY? "

At this time "Popsicle" growls and bites on to Tart's ear.

"See? She loves me!"

"Get it out now, Tart!"

"Okay……."

Tart left the room with a sad look on his face.

"He didn't have to get rid of it, you know." Pai remarked

"Pai! At night, "Popsicle" is gonna creep into his room and EAT OUT HIS GUTS! HE'LL BE DEAD BY NIGHTFALL!"

"He did look a little upset, though."

"W could always get him something else."

"Be my guest"

………………………………..The next morning…………………………………

Tart walked out of his bedroom to find his two companions in the living room, Kish with a big, cheesy smile on his face.

"What's going on?" he yawned.

"We have a surprise for you!"

"What?"

"See for yourself!"

Kish then held up the cutest little white bunny imaginable.

"AAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUGH!"

Tart was screaming for his life.

"What is it?!"

"I'm scared of bunnies, Kish! They creep me out!"

"Oh, come on! It's harmless! See?"

Kisshu sat the rabbit on the floor next to Tart.

"Oh……"

It hopped closer.

"Oh!"

It was now about 2 inches away from Tart's hand.

"GetitawaygetitawayGETITAWAY!!!!"

The bunny licked his fingers.

"OH MY GOD!!!!!"

Tart then threw the bunny against the wall, and it well, "Kicked the bucket" so to speak.

"Alright. Bunnies not a good idea."

…………………………………….The next, next morning……………………….……...

"Okay, I think you'll find this one _much_ better than the rabbit, Tart."

(Yawn) "I will?"

"Yup!"

Kish plopped the new animal down on the table.

"It's a turtle, see?"

"It's ugly."

"Oh c'mon! It's fun, see?"

"It's green and wrinkly. Like Kish's mom."

"WHAT?! Pai! Back me up here!"

"Well, your mother _is _a tiny bit wrinkly….."

"THAT'S IT! THE TURTLE GOES _NOW_!"

……………………………….The next, next, NEXT morning……………………………

"Alrighty, I really think you're gonna like this one!"

"Here we go again….."

"Shuddup, Pai! Now, here you go!"

Kisshu proceeds to hand Tart one of those goldfish in a plastic bag.

"See, it's a fish!"

"It's sorta boring. All it does is sit there! IT DOESN'T EVEN BLINK, FOR PETE'S SAKE!"

"Oh, PLEASE!"

"Alright! C'mon fishie! Do something!"

Tart began to shake the bag.

"DO SOMETHIIIIIIIIING!"

Well. We can all guess what happens now.

"Kish? Why is the fishie sleeping upside down?"

"Okay then. The fish was a bad idea."

……………………….. The next, next, NEXT morning AFTER that…………………..

"Tart, I think we might have found something you'll like!"

"Can I just go back to bed?"

"No." Kish handed Tart a hamster.

"Hey, this….this is actually cute!"

"I knew you'd like it!"

"I'm gonna call it Marshmallow!"

"Why Marshmallow?"

"It rhymes with TUNA! Duh."

"Okay….."

"Oooo……"Tart began to squeeze the hamster "I… (Squeeze) love… (Squeeze) you… (Squeeze) so… (Squeeze) MUCH!

BOOM!

That hamster was gone in an explosion of fur.

"M-Marshmallow?"

"Oh, WHY ME?!"

...The morning after the next, next, NEXT, morning after that...

Kisshu was talking to Pai.

"What'll we do? He's a maniac! He strangled the hamster, threw the bunny, shook the fish's bag, AND HE INSULTED MY MOTHER WITH THAT TURTLE!"

"WE could always get him that thing back."

"But he'll be eaten alive!"

"Think about it Kish! If he was eaten, would it really be that bad?!"

"I never thought of it that way……………….Okay. I'll get Popsicle back."

……..The morning after the next, next, NEXT, morning after the morning after that…….

"T_aaaaa_rt! We've got something for you!"

"If it's another hamster, I don't want it. They're a little too delicate for me."

"No, look who it is…." Kish holds up "Popsicle"

"POPSICLE! I missed you so much!

Tart grabbed "Popsicle" out of Kish's hands and hugged her.

"I missed you!"

…The next morning after the next, next, NEXT morning after the morning after that…

Tart came into Kish's room

"Kish?"

"What?"

"I think something's wrong with Popsicle. She's not foaming at the mouth anymore!"

Pai came in behind him. "Let me look at her." He said as he proceeded to pick up the animal and look it over." Mmm hmm. "I think Popsicle is pregnant."

"WWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!"

……………………………………….I lost track………………………………………

"TART! GUESS WHAT!"

"What is it?"

Pai but in. "That _thing_ had babies last night,"

"She did?! YAY!"

"Yes. And now that the babies aren't covered in mange, rabies, and other…..uh….various diseases, we can finally tell what species she is."

"Well, what is it? I wanna know!"

"Look….." Kish said, proudly holding up one of the babies.

"…….It's a bunny!"

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Yeah. Longest one yet.


	7. Sarcasm Lessons

Chocolate Pudding-chan: I am not dead! I've been at camp all week and haven't been able to update. Uber sorry! Well, on with the chapter. Splee!

A bonus disclaimer: I do not own the show Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends.

* * *

A lesson in sarcasm

(Yes. I stole this from Foster's. That show just inspires me! I just converted it into TMM style.)

Tart was pouting. Earlier that day, Pai had said Tart would get cookies if he went to battle. The battle was over, and there were still no cookies.

"He said he'd get me some!"

Hearing Tart whine, Kish stepped in.

"I think he was being sarcastic."

"What's "Sarcastic"?

"You don't know?!"

"I don't think so."

Kish dragged Tart into the room where Pai was working at the computer.

"Pai! Tart says he doesn't know what sarcasm is!"

"What?! Tart, you use sarcasm all the time!"

"_Sure _I do, Pai."

"You're……totally messing with us, aren't you?"

…………………………………To the kitchen…………………………………

"Alright, Taruto…." Kisshu began. "Here's your first lesson. Say you want a cookie. Well, instead of saying, 'Gimme a cookie!' you could say, 'No Pai, don't worry about _me_ I _hate_ cookies.' See?"

Pai gave Kisshu a cookie.

"You try it."

"Okay!" Tart faced Pai. "I _waaaant _a _cooooooooooookie_!"

"Wait, are you being sarcastic?"

"I'm being _hhhhhhhhuuuuuuuuuuungryyyyyyyyy!_"

"Maybe we should try something else."

……………………………….Down in a park in Tokyo……………………………..

"Okay, lesson two, making fun of others by using fake compliments. Like this."

Kish spotted Lettuce. "Hey Lettuce! _Nice glasses_."

Pai looked at the hot dog vender "Hey, Mr.! Your hot dogs are _incredibly nutritious_."

"Strange example there, but now you can try it!"

"Hmm, let's see….." Tart saw Ichigo walking down the sidewalk.

"Hey, Ichigo! You're _so beautiful_."

"Gee, thanks, Tart."

"No, I was being sarcastic, I meant you're ugly."

"Yes, and you're a _super genius_. This conversation is over."

"Wow! She called me a Super genius!

"Oh, boy……"

……………………………………..Back at the ship…………………………………….

"I'm running out of examples! How about, telling a joke by using sarcasm!"

"How would I do that?"

"Well uh, like, 'Why did the chicken cross the road?'"

"Why?"

" 'Because it _had_ to get to the other side.'"

"That was a lame joke!"

"Yes, but I was just using an example."

"Well that was a _great_ example, Kisshu!"

"See! You just used it!"

"_Sure_ I did."

"Yes! Say that again."

"That again."

"No! Say what you said before!"

"What you said before."

"Never mind! I have an idea!"

"Never mind! I have an idea."

Kisshu sighed in exasperation. "Tart, are you getting _any_ of this?"

"Sorta. I'm getting the part where you use sarcasm when you say something you don't really mean."

"YES! That's right!"

"So, if I said, 'Kish is a moron', and I was being sarcastic, I wouldn't really mean it?"

"Pretty much."

"But I do mean it!"

"HEY! You're such a weirdo, Tart!"

"_Sure _I am, Kisshu."

* * *

See! I'm not dead, I tells ya'! 


	8. Another author's note!

Dear Readers:

Pudding is SORRY! I can't update for a week or so because I'll be on vacation in the mountains. Please be patient! Love 'ya.

Chocolate Pudding-chan


	9. Bedtime can be an issue

Chocolate Pudding-chan: OMG! I'M STILL HERE! Yeah. New chapter up at last! Enjoy.

* * *

Tart lay awake in his bed. It was about 3:00 A.M. and no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't sleep. So, spur of the moment, He decided to call Kisshu.

Kish answered groggily:

"Mm…Hello?"

"HI Kish!"

"Ugh, Tart! It's 3 in the morning! What do you want?"

"I can't sleep!"

"Well, whoop dee diddly doo. Goodbye."

"WAIT! I'm lonely. And it's dark in here!"

"Then turn on the lights."

"I can't sleep with the lights on!"

"Than use use a night light or something!"

"Night lights are for babies!"

"Being afraid of the dark is for babies!"

Then Tart started to cry.

"Y-You're Mean!"

"Well, fabulous. STOP CALLING ME!"

Kish hung up the phone.

_Great then._ Thought Tart_ I guess I'll call Pai!_

Tart dialed Pai's cell number.

"Hello…" Pai answered, still half asleep.

"Pai! I can't—"

Dial Tone

"Hello? Pai?"

Tart redialed, only to be answered by a woman's voice reciting:

"_The number you have reached has been disconnected. Please hang up and try again……._"

"Drat!" Tart said. But then he hatched and idea.

He crept into Kish's room and tapped his shoulder, whispering:

"Kish! Kish, wake up!"

"Ug, Tart! Go away!"

"My bed's not comfy. Can I sleep in here?"

"NO! Go to sleep!"

"Okies!"

Tart pushed Kish out of the bed and plopped down in it.

"Tart! Not in my bed!"

"Can't hear you, I'm sleeping."

Kish slumped into Tart's room and layed down.

"Guess I'll sleep here."

Kish tossed and turned, but then just gave up.

"Tart was right, this bed sucks!"

"He went back into his own room

"Tart! Wake up and get out of my bed!"

"No….."

Kish was fed up. It was 4:30, and he was fed up.

"That's it!" He screeched, picking up tart and slinging him over his shoulder.

"You are going to your own bed NOW!"

"NO! Put me down!"

Kish threw Tart into his room, slammed the door, and locked it.

"Kish! Don't leave me here alone! I gotta go potty!"

"FINE!"

Kish unlocked the door, Tart went to the bathroom, then came back in.

"Done?"

"Yups!"

"Good. Go to bed."

A few minutes later

"Kish?"

"Oh, what now?!"

"I'm hungry. Could you make be a Pepperoni and Pickle sammich?"

"NO!"

"But Kish! You know if I don't have a Pepperoni and Pickle sammich or I'll get nightmares!"

"You're gonna have to suffer."

"KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISH!"

"Okay! Just stop that!"

Kish finished the sandwich and slid it under the door.

"Happy now?"

Tart, with a mouthful of "Sammich" replied with a satisfied "Yeptf"

"You don't have to pee anymore?"

"Nope."

"And you not hungry?"

"Uh-uh."

"So you can FINALLY go to bed?"

"I guess so!"

"At last…."

Kish crawled backed into bed.

But, a few minutes later;

"Kish?"

"What?" He hissed

"It's dark in here!"

* * *

Chocolate Pudding-chan: Done. 


	10. A Cheesy ending

Chocolate Pudding-chan: Hey everyone! I bet you all thought that I had abandoned this fanfic, huh? Well surprise, I did. Unfortunately for some, This is the last, short but sweet chapter to "Aardvarks". But readers, do not worry! I am starting another new story about everyone's three favorite aliens. Sneak peek at the end of the chappie. Enjoy!

* * *

Tart stared at the food in the bowl in front of him. "_I can't believe this!"_ he thought._ "How could they do this to me?!" _

"Hey Tart?" Kish mumbled with a mouthful of salad, "You gonna eat this or what?"

"How could you?" Tart said quietly.

"Speak up." Pai remarked, and anyone watching could probably tell that he didn't care.

"Just HOW do you expect me to eat this stuff?!"

"Uh, what?" Kish was a little puzzled. Tart had been whining about how hungry he was all day, and it was Kish's turn to make dinner. Now, you must know, our dear Kisshu does not know the first thing about cooking. So he found some vegetables, put them in a bowl and called it "Salad".

"What's wrong with it?"

"IT'S A SALAD!"

"Yeah…so?"

"ARE YOU INSANE?! I CAN'T EAT PLANTS!"

"Uh, why _not_?"

"Let me explain." Pai began. "Tart loves plants, if you haven't noticed yet. I believe that the thought of ingesting them disturbs him."

"Okay, what?!"

Pai sighed. "To put it in simpler terms, Tart has a thing for plants and won't eat them because he thinks they have feelings."

"'Cause they do!" Tart was upset.

"I'm not gonna eat this, and you can't make me." Then Tart did the most mature thing he could think of.

He stuck out his tongue.

"Alright. Fine." Even Kish knew better than to even _try_ to argue with Tart when he was in one of his "Moods". "If you don't want it, go make yourself a TV dinner, we have mac and cheese in the fridge."

"You're not even gonna try to— "

"Nope. Go."

Tart came out a few minutes later with the open cardboard tray with the noodles and cheese inside. He just stared.

"What's wrong now?" Kisshu was becoming impatient.

"I don't like this macaroni." Tart glared at those noodles harder than any other noodles had ever been glared at before.

"_Why?!"_

"All the cheese is bunched up on one side!"

"That's 'cause you're supposed to stir it though the noodles! Didn't you read the instructions?"

"Yes."

"So….?"

"The instructions clearly say, 'After heating the package for two to three minutes, spread the cheese into the noodles'."

"What don't you understand about that?"

"It says 'Spread'. You said to 'Stir'."

"There's no difference!"

"NO DIFFERECE?!" This made Taruto _very _upset.

"THERE IS TOO A DIFFERENCE! If you were making a grilled-cheese sammich, you wouldn't 'stir' the cheese onto the bread! You'd SPREAD IT! THERE'S A GINORMOUS DIFFERENCE!"

"Then spread the cheese for all I care!"

"NO!"

"WHY NOT?!"

"What idiot would 'Spread' cheese on noodles?! You're supposed to stir it."

* * *

Chocolate Pudding-chan: Well that was it. I really hoe you enjoyed Aardvarks, I certainly enjoyed writing it. Another big thanks to all you reviewers out there that gave me support, I couldn't have finished without you! And now the moment you've all been waiting for, a sneak peek at my new work!

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"Are you sure you know how to drive this thing? Can't I drive?"

"If I can drive a spaceship, I can drive this hunk of metal humans call a 'car'. Besides, you're only fourteen. You're too young to have a human license."

"Do _you _have a license?"

"Maybe……"

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Don't worry, Tart's in there, too! Up probably by tomorrow. Thanks again. Bye!


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